I don’t know about you but I know that I have high expectations of my performances. I expect my dinner table to be set beautifully, I see images of how I expect the table to look. I have expectations of how people will respond to things I say and when it doesn’t happen, I’m frozen. In class, I thought I knew an answer so I raised my hand. I was expecting the teacher to praise me, to say “yes, Rachel, thats exactly the answer.” I want to be okay in people’s eyes. I want to be accepted. I want to be more than okay, really, I want to be treasured and valued, the way I never have been. I should know already that when I have the image in my head, it will not come to reality. I know it stems from that message that I’m not good enough that was fed to me by mean people but it doesn’t mean that I need to continue falling into the trap. I know that I need to be gentle with myself and set attainable expectations.
I hope you have found your way in helping deal with disappointment when expectations were not met. I’d love to hear about it.